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16min: “This makes no sense,” writes Jon Cummins, who could be talking about anything. “I’m a Man Utd fan, and I was pretty worried about this game … until I saw the teamsheet. Amazingly, seeing Jonny Evans and Wes Brown at the back, with Anderson in midfield, filled me with confidence. A sad indictment on the recent form of Rio, Vidic and Scholes, and perhaps my judgement.”
15 min: Nani tries to dink the ball past Chimbonda on the right touchline and is tripped. Free-kick for United. Nani sends the ball into the pemnalty area where it’s headed clear by Ryan Nelson.
14 min: Blackburn are doing well so far, containing Manchester United fairly easily by trying to force them to attack down the centre, where there’s safety in numbers. They’ve certainly silenced the crowd in Old Trafford.
12 min: Standing in the inside right channel, Berbatov sends the ball over two Blackburn defenders and into the path of Antonio Valencia with a flick of his right boot. The Ecuadorian winger snatches at his shot from 14 yards and sends a feeble effort wide.
10 min: Antonio Valencia slaloms down the right wing and sends in a cross that’s intended for Wayne Roney, but his delivery is horribly wayward.
8 min: “Charlie Brooker’s Screen Burn today conjures the delightful image of ‘a 64-year-old man with a nose like a thumped glans’,” writes Paul Dixon. “Could he and Sir Alex Ferguson by any chance be related?”
6 min: “Just like Cannabis, LSD and Ecstasy, which team should now be reclassified?” asks John Martin. “Which team is without its potency, and which team has had its potency exaggerated and will anyone resign as a consequence?” Well, Liverpool should obviously be downgraded from a Class A side, but it’s too early to tell whether they should be reclassified as a Class D or E drug. Their fans certainly aren’t experiencing the euphoric highs once associated with their team, although fans of other teams are definitely buzzing nicely off them.
5 min: Moments before that Blackburn attack, Nani had gone galloping down the left wing, cut inside Pascal Chimbonda and tried a shot from distance that went well wide.
4 min: David Dunn goes on a surging run into the penalty area and goes to ground under pressure from Evans. He neither appeals for nor gets a penalty.
2 min: Blackburn have lined up with four across the back, and Steven Nzonzi patrolling the space between them and the midfielders: Dunn in the centre between Emerton and Andrews.
1 min: Blackburn win the first corner of the game after a simple free-kick into the box is headed down by Samba and goes out off Evans. Nothing comes from the inswinger.
1 min: Blackburn kick off, playing into the Stretford End. Both sides are in their customary home strips: United in red shirts, white shorts and black socks; Rovers in blue and white halved shirts, white shorts and blue socks.
Punting corner: Following my earlier Arsenal/Arsenal success in the HT/FT market, I’ve gone for a Draw/Man Utd here.
Pre-match niceties: There’s no Ferdinand, Vidic, Scholes, Fletcher or Giggs for Manchester United, with Messrs Evans, Brown, Anderson and Nani making rare-ish starts. For Blackburn, striker Jason Roberts has gone down with swine flu, cancelling out Christopher Samba’s recovery from the virus. On-loan-from-Chelsea striker Franco Di Santo comes in for Roberts. David Dunn has recovered from the illness and starts in midfield, while manager Sam Allardyce has also risen from his sick-bed to take his place in the dugout.
Man Utd: Van der Sar, O’Shea, Brown, Jonathan Evans, Evra, Valencia, Carrick, Anderson, Nani, Berbatov, Rooney.
Subs: Kuszczak, Owen, Scholes, Fabio Da Silva, Fletcher, Obertan, De Laet.
Blackburn: Robinson, Chimbonda, Samba, Nelsen, Givet, Nzonzi, Emerton, Dunn, Andrews, Diouf, Di Santo.
Subs: Brown, McCarthy, Grella, Pedersen, Kalinic, Hoilett, Salgado.
Referee: Phil Dowd (Staffordshire)
Well, well, well. What a day it’s been in the Premier League. It kicked off at 12.45pm, where Spurs were lucky to get away with a 3-0 thumping at the hands of Arsenal, Chelsea extended their lead at the top of the Premier League table with a 4-0 win at Bolton, while nine-man Liverpool went down 3-1 at Craven Cottage, losing their sixth match out of seven in all competitions.
At the other end of the table, Hull lost against Burnley in what will almost certainly be Phil Brown’s last match in charge, while Portsmouth put four past Wigan without reply, in a match that was most notable for Arune Dindane socring a hat-trick despite showing no evidence that he could hit a cow’s arse with the proverbial banjo in recent weeks.
Elsewhere, there were draws between Everton and Aston Villa, Sunderland and West Ham, and Stoke and Wolves on an afternoon that card-happy referees sent off eight players: Degen and Carragher (Liverpool), Samuel (Bolton), Geovanni (Hull City), Bilyaletdinov (Everton), Cuellar (Everton), Jones (Sunderland) and Kovac (West Ham).
And if all that’s not bizarre enough for you, Wolves centre-half Jody Craddock went from scoring one goal in five years to two in 20 minutes, as he notched both his side’s goals in their draw with Stoke City. Get your money on Blackburn to win this match despite Gary Neville’s hat-trick to put the cherry on top of a remarkable afternoon’s Premier League football.
Premier LeagueBlackburn RoversManchester UnitedMinute-by-minute reportBarry Glendenningguardian.co.uk
